Local EnglishTurn left at the robot, and do not wait for ‘just now’.
Directions here come with robots — traffic lights. ‘Now now’ means in a few minutes; ‘just now’ means some time later, possibly much later, so plan around it. And at the robot itself, keep the phone and the bag off the passenger seat: thieves break car windows at junctions for whatever is in view, so everything goes in the boot.
Food fightA braai is not a barbecue. Do not call it one.
The braai is how South Africa socialises: boerewors, lamb chops and sosaties over the coals, pap on the side, and guests who arrive with their own meat or a salad in hand. Heritage Day, 24 September, doubles as National Braai Day. Call it a barbecue and someone will explain the difference at length. If you are invited, bring something for the grill.
MythFalse Bay lost its great whites to two orcas.
Before 2015 False Bay was famous for great white sharks. Then two male orcas, known as Port and Starboard, started hunting them for their livers, and by 2020 sightings in the bay were close to zero. The penguins on the same bay did better: Boulders Beach went from two breeding pairs in 1982 to a colony of a few thousand. Ask cage-diving operators about recent sightings before you pay.
Unwritten rulesThe person in the bright vest is a car guard, working for tips.
In many car parks someone in a high-visibility vest watches the cars and waves you out of the space. It is informal work — car guards are self-employed and the tips are the income — so keep a few coins or a small note in the car for when you leave. A watched car is also a less tempting one for thieves.
SoundtrackThe soundtrack is amapiano, and it started here.
The log-drum-heavy house sound came out of Gauteng’s townships in the mid-2010s and now has charts of its own abroad. Tyla’s ‘Water’, pop with amapiano in its bones, won the first Grammy for Best African Music Performance in 2024. Johannesburg is where to hear it properly; ask a local where this weekend’s good sessions are, because the answer changes.